Journal Entry: Feb 18, 2016 (PMDDuh!)

Journal Entry: Feb 18, 2016 (PMDDuh!)

Journal Entry: Feb 18, 2016 (PMDDuh!)

Brushed Teeth: Yes
Walked: Yes, 50 min 2.69 miles
Healthy Breakfast: Yes
Shower: Yes (but, not immediately)
Mood: Blah and then content and focused

So I got up whenever today because my daughter didn’t have school again. I got to the gym and the maintenance guy who I say hi to every morning walked up to me, looked at me and then his watch and asked, “What’d you sleep in today?” I felt pretty good about that. I’m a regular at the gym. Take that scale! I worked extra hard today because of my poor eating yesterday. I usually do 10 minutes on the bike as a warm up I did 15 minutes at a faster pace this morning. I usually do 3 sets of my strength training exercises, today I did 4 sets. I did my 50 minutes on the treadmill a bit faster than usual too.

I got home from the gym and ate my healthy breakfast halfheartedly. Still feeling awful blah. I decided to start catching up on overdue blog posts. I wrote to my therapist, who I had to cancel on this week, about my depression and how bad it has been this last week. I just didn’t really want to do anything and then it hit me after I started spotting. I have PMDD! That is what this past week has been. It’s always the week before my period. I just completely forgot about it. Remember how when I remembered last month that I have PMDD I said I started tracking stuff…well I said that in a sort of I totally intend to sort of way. I never did and it bit me right in the ass this week. As soon as I realized it I took the extra Paxil my psychiatrist prescribed for this very reason and things started getting better either due to the Paxil or due to PMDD wearing off because my period was beginning either/or the blah cloud has lifted.

Tonight I took a hot yoga class called Reiki Yoga (again trying to undo the crazy eating I did yesterday). I didn’t know what I expected from it but, I love reiki and yoga so I thought it would probably be pretty good. It was a lot more yoga than reiki which is fine, I guess I was just expecting more reiki. Not sure how you’d implement that to a full class but, still. All that was reiki about it was the instructor describing the chakras and asking us to visualize them at the beginning and end of class. She also said that she was a practitioner and would be sending positive energy through the whole class. Basically it was a hot yoga class and it was hard for me. I did all of the moves but, a couple that she repeated multiple times I sat out the last go or two.

Do any of you suffer from a condition like PMDD or SAD or another occasional illness? Do you ever forget about it like I did and just think your depression is worsening? I’d love to hear from you. I hope this post finds you well or on your way to wellness.

 

Journal Entry: Jan 19, 2016 (Good Therapy Session)

Journal Entry: Jan 19, 2016 (Good Therapy Session)

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Today I woke up, brushed my teeth, and went to the gym, in the right order this time. The mile felt harder today for some reason, probably because I didn’t stretch yesterday. I did today so I hope tomorrow it’ll be a little easier. I then went to my Sister’s house to spend time with her and my two adorable nephews who are crazy but, super adorable so I don’t mind. They are almost 3 and 8 months old. I wrote in yesterday’s journal entry that tomorrow (Wednesday) I was going to try to take the 30 mg slow release Adderall and see if I could stay out of bed all day, I realized today that is quite a jump from 10 mg-30 mg so instead I’ve decided to take 20 mg of the fast acting stuff today I took one in the am and one around 5pm, before I got too lazy to see if it keeps me going if it does I think I’ve solved the problem but, I really should step it up slowly so 1 week with two doses of 10 mg a day and then I’ll increase to the 30 mg. Very boring stuff I am sure. I treated myself today to Ida Maria’s album Fortress ’round My Heart which is my favorite but, I didn’t own for some reason. I also treated myself to a dozen white roses. I hate grocery shopping so I think I deserve a reward for doing so and buying some healthy junk too. Read more